I love Carlos Zambrano

Carlos Zambrano is one of my favorite players. The guy gets so fired up sometimes! He's an animal, like me. Check out this clip of him getting tossed on Wednesday. He tries to toss the umpire!

Then he chucks the ball into the stands and takes a bat to an innocent drink dispenser in the dugout. He da man! The man with a six-game suspension, it turns out.

Jax

Lazy day

Hey everybody, Jax here.

Things are good. We listened to the Giants beat the Braves yesterday on the radio. I was lying under a tree in the shade, it was great. Hopefully the Giants can win tonight with Lincecum starting.

Travis Ishikawa (nickname: Eeesh) hit his first dinger of the year on Monday, a three run homer just days after Jesus Guzman was called up from Triple A to try to take his position. Coincidence? The world may never know.

I'm going to hibernate in the garage now.

Adios

Jax

Well, that wasn't fun

Forget it. Playing the Padres just doesn't work, even with Tim Lincecum on the mound. On to the Mariners.

Randy Johnson will start tonight in Seattle, chasing his 300th win. From what I hear, the road to 300 is already starting to be a drag for all involved. Johnson has been giving all kinds of interviews about this feat he hasn't done yet, he spent an afternoon with a Sports Illustrated scribe, he's flying his family out to Seattle for the series ... He has indicated that he just wants to get the thing over with. Photo by Jed Jacobsohn/Getty Images.

The 6'10" lefty sits at 298 wins, but his stuff hasn't been the greatest lately. Baseball is obsessed with milestones, but given the wins and losses for pitchers is a fairly useless stat, what's all the fuss about? I mean, I get that R.J. (Don't call him Big Unit) is a hall of famer, I get that his longevity is amazing, but how many of those losses were because he got no run support? How many runs did he give up in his wins?

Speaking of useless stats, I heard Texas Rangers Club President Nolan Ryan is calling bullsh*t on pitch counts. Too many managers are pulling starters when their pitch count gets in the 80s or 90s to "protect their investment," even if the guy is still getting guys out.

Ryan calls it an experiment, I call it a return to common sense. Barry Zito, of all people, pitched a complete game the other night for the Giants, and C.C. Sabathia has pitched like 10 complete games from last season to now. You don't need to be as huge as Sabathia (and God knows he's not perfect), but if pitchers keep keep nailing strikes, let them play. They're ballplayers! Just give the catcher a rest now and then. Alot of baseball is about numbers, but a manager has to go with his gut sometimes.



Speaking of guts, at about 6:30 this morning I was snoring peacefully downstairs when I had to heave my guts all over the floor again. I ate a dixie cup or something out of the trash and it came back out. Whew, I do feel a lot better now.

Those bastards are barbecuing again. I hope I can get a piece of that ...

Jax

Padres stink

Hey everybody, Jax here, blogging on the deck for a change.

The only thing worse than getting beat by the Padres is watching a perfectly good complete game by Barry Zito go to waste. Last night Scott Hairston continued to own the Giants with two walks, a hit and a home run to down the Giants 2-1. Hairston photo by Pictopia.com.

The Padres are barely out of the NL West cellar (don't worry, it's May) and I hope to God the Giants can win the rest of the series. Unfortunately, we've got Jonathan Sanchez starting tonight, who is a head case if I ever saw one. This guy will be lights out for an inning, then completely lose his cool and walk like five guys and just swear at himself on the mound. He has decent stuff, but I can tell just by watching him on TV when he gets frustrated and has no command. Imagine what the hitters can tell!

He is the like the opposite of Andy Pettite, who's got that hat pulled down so low you wonder how he can see at all. Sanchez (or "Sanchy" as Giants Manager Bruce Bochy likes to call him) has been rumored for a trade.

However, SF Chronicle Giants beat writer Henry Schulman pointed out on KNBR last night that May is no time to trade anyone--especially with Sanchy's stock sinking. The time to trade is closer to the trade deadline. Teams will be more desperate and the Giants can get a better deal to trade him for a hitter. Who knows, maybe the Giants will be in contention. They're second in the NL West right now, 7 1/2 games back. Maybe the wildcard is doable.

The Giants also can't afford to lose Sanchy right now because their next best starting pitcher is Madison Bumgarner, who is a prospect with exactly one start so far in Double A. He has a lot of hype surrounding him, but still.

So, in other words, we're in for Headcase Sanchez tonight. I hope this guy doesn't play poker--he'd lose his shirt.

Jax

Feast

Oh man. I had such a good breakfast of cat food this morning. It was so tasty. I'm not supposed to eat that stuff, and I get scolded when I do, but it was sooooo worth it. It's so moist and delicious, and a big bowl of it was just sitting in Brooke's closet like a forgotten candy bar. After a meal like that, I like to have a big bowl of water (see photo) and light up a nice cigar.

Speaking of getting lit up, that's pretty much what happened to Giants closer Brian Wilson last night in the top of the ninth inning. The Mets took a 4-4 tie and cranked out 3 more runs to win the game 7-4. It wasn't all Wilson's fault, but what a deflating defeat. Wilson photo by Lisa Blumenfeld/Getty Images.

The Giants have the weekend games to redeem themselves, and on Saturday Randy Johnson is facing Johan Santana. Sunday's game is on ESPN at 5 p.m. PST. Lick it up.

Jax

My shearing, Panda's walkoff

Baaaaa.

Since we're easing in to summer and I was looking like a black sheep, I got sheared on Monday. I feel so much cooler now, like a new dog. Hello, summer, and Thank You Brooke.

Panda (Pablo Sandoval) hit a three-run jack over the left field wall at AT&T last night to beat the Nationals 9-7. It was a helluva hit, and it puts the Giants in a position to sweep Washington. Photo by Stiv.com.

Hey, I know it's just the Nationals, but there's no degree of difficulty points we're going for here. The Giants are just trying to win some games. By the way, Pablo bats switch and he was hitting right handed when he launched that one in to the seats. Long live Panda!

Jax

Manny, Brian Wilson, death march hikes ...

OK, so I didn't exactly break the news that Man-Ram tested positive for HCG, the female fertility drug used to mask steroids. But like Damon Bruce of SportsPhone680 said, it's not a sad day for baseball. It's an ordinary day for baseball.

This stuff is common.

Now, that out of the way, too bad the suspension won't last more than 50 games. Maybe Manny will get fat and complacent in the downtime, that would be great. Then maybe the Giants can get a handle on the NL West. Right now the Giants are 4 1/2 games back to the Dodgers, even though we took 2 out of 3 from them in Chavez Ravine this weekend. I listened to Sunday's game on the radio in the shade, next to Stephen, who totally stole my hammock. He had a beer and I had some ice cubes in my water dish. We were exhausted from work, so it was great to just chill and listen to the game go into 13 innings. And, by the way, I'm hot here in this fur coat I can't take off. Can somebody shave me already?

The only other news (read: gossip) that came out the game was that Giants Closer Brian Wilson apparently got a photo sent to his cell phone from the Dodgers' Casey Blake. The photo showed Blake mocking Wilson with his arms crossed and fingers pointed, the way Wilson does after every save to honor his dead father and his Christianity. So Blake, really classy buddy. F-ing Dodgers.

Between that and Dodger fans heckling Aaron Rowand in center field, the rivalry is alive and well. Our pitchers cannot stop Juan Pierre, but at least we won the series.
The Giants have won or split their last 8 series, and Manager Bruce Bochy said that would be the goal going in to each series, so I think the Giants are doing OK. The next month is going to be key though. They face the Nationals, who are actually hot right now, then the Mets, then at San Diego.

Let's go Giants.

Jax

Ordinary people

I'm sidelined again, with this stupid Jungle Paw.

I was running around in the rain a lot last week and it just got red and chapped between the pads of my paws. It seems to be getting better though, Stephen and Brooke have been drying them off all the time and putting this dang spray and lotion on it. I think they're drying out, and the weather is drying out, so I should be good. I really like to lick my paws a lot, since it's all I can do, but maybe that's actually making them more raw. Hmmm. I'll have to think about that. Maybe I'm doing the wrong thing here. Hmmm. Naah. Hold on, let me lick my raw paws some more ...

I just really need my paws for everything: Walking, running, typing, pulling the slot machine, dealing hands of poker to my friend Healey, mixing drinks, turning on the hot tub ...

Anyway, in my downtime I've been reading Giants players' blogs. Catcher Bengie Molina has one, you already know, called Behind the Mask.

Now outfielder Fred Lewis has one too on the Comcast site, called FdotLew.

Lewis' posts, like Bengie's, make him out to be a regular guy, which I appreciate. Fred talks about getting a 1970 Oldsmobile Cutlass recently that he wants to restore. He talks about visiting a children's hospital in L.A. on a off day (Rookie charity stuff is common, but still).

Bengie, who is in a contract year, talks about writing "All Out Everyday" under the bill of his ballcap, and he looks at it before every game. Bengie photo by BaseballMusings.com. Everybody (SF Chronicle's Bruce Jenkins, SJ Mercury News' Tim Kawakami) is saying Bengie's contract should be renewed, and I have to agree. He gets clutch hits all the time.

Bengie's not the lightest guy out there (about a deuce, deuce and a half), and when he rounded second base for a triple the other day announcer Mike Krukow said he looked like a "runaway beer truck."

That's about right. But we love beer.

Lawd, what a race!

Hey everybody, Jax here. Yeah, so my Derby predictions weren't quite on the mark ... Even though I lost my shirt at the sports book, I was truly happy to see Calvin Borel win at 50-1. I'll jump on that bandwagon.

The guy was just oozing with joy as he took a victory lap. The way he talked right after the race just shook me up. And three Top 3 finishes at the Derby in three years is impressive.

Also, you gotta love the hasty interview with Mine that Bird's trainer, Bennie Woolley Jr., after the race. The NBC guy kept saying how Woolley drove there 2,700 miles from New Mexico and nobody knew who he was, pretty much making him look like a fool. Woolley just stood there straight faced under a black cowboy hat, holding crutches under his arms. He leaned into the mic and said, "Well, I guess they'll know me now."

Awesome stuff.

Want to see what pure joy looks like? Borel gets interviewed at about the 3:30 mark.


He has also drawn some comparisons to Waterboy, but I dunno about that ...


Also, Pacquiao did win by TKO, so close but no cigar. There are rumors he might run for president of the Philippines ...

Last minute picks

I know it's last minute, and by the time many of you read this it will be Monday morning, but here we go.

Pacquiao/Hatton bout: I like Manny Pacquiao over Ricky Hatton, by decision. Hatton's weight has been swinging around too much and Manny is more determined. The fight is in Vegas on Pay Per View, for those of you living under a rock.

Kentucky Derby:Jax's Superfecta--Pioneer of the Nile, Dunkirk, I Want Revenge and Desert Party. Those four hourses are in a class by themselves. I'd like to say that is a "stone cold lock" (thanks, Tony Bruno) but Friesan Fire likes the mud, so we'll see what happens. A certain Daily Racing Form writer seems to think those four are the best, so if you're betting today ...