My blog turns 1 today

Hey kids, ol' Jax here.

The blog turns one year old today, Aug. 19. In dog years that's like what, age 21? So have a beer.

I'm in the garage right now waiting for the fog to lift outside. There's a half-assembled Weber grill in here. Does he expect me to put this together? Hello, do you really want me messing with propane with no opposable thumbs?

The Giants came from four runs back to beat the Reds 8-5 in 10 innings last night, and Ryan Garko had two clutch hits including the RBI double in the 10th that won it.

"Maybe now my teammates will stop avoiding eye contact with me in the locker room," Garko probably thought as he stood on second base.

Garko had been hitting .224 since he joined the Giants at the trade deadline. Some fans (and maybe teammates) doubted him.


Giants announcer Dave Fleming asked him after the game how it's been on the squad so far. His first response was "Uh, it's been OKAY ..." then he launched in to how great the team was and the fans and the city blah blah blah. Garko photo by bayareasportsguy.com.

For once it would be nice if a ballplayer were honest and said "Actually, these guys are pretty frosty when your situational hitting sucks."

This 11-game road trip to New York, Cincinnati and Colorado started off horribly at that first game at Citi Field. Then in the last game in New York the Giants exploded for a 10-1 win and split the series. Hopefully that momentum can continue in Cincinnati. The Giants are better than the Reds, c'mon, they're 16 1/2 games out of the NL Central. They don't have a snowball's chance. Then again, neither do the Mets and they whooped us for two games.

Also in New York, Matt Cain threw a fastball that clanked off David Wright's helmet and sent him to the hospital. Wright might be out for the season. Cain rarely beans guys, I have to believe it was a mistake. Nonetheless, the retaliatory pitches flew at catcher Bengie Molina in the next inning.

Let's hope Zito can get it done tonight in Cincy.

Jax

Shark Week

Hey guys, Jax here, sweating in the garage.

We have a shop fan running in here and the side door open, so I just sit here and sleep and surf the Internet.

Anyway, we were watching Shark Week on the Discovery Channel the last few nights. Man, are those things fierce. Especially the Bull Sharks (Zambezis), once they touch something they are so agressive they will just gobble it up. Photo by underwatervideo.co.za.


Kind of like the opposite of the Giants' road offense, wouldn't you say?

I mean, in Monday night's game the bases were loaded in the 6th inning with one out. Two Giants came to the plate, including Eugenio Velez, and they just could not knock a run in. It basically cost them the game and they lost 4-3 to Houston. Last night's game was better, and the Giants hit a home run for the first time since June. No joke. Freddy Sanchez launched one and Pablo Sandoval hit another in the next at-bat. Pablo photo by sportsgrumblings.com.


If this road trip is an indication of the Giants' playoff chances, their hitting with runners in scoring position has got to get better. Especially on the road.

Right now their team RISP is not shark like. It's more like bait.

Jax

I think I have sleep apnea

Hey guys, Jax here.

After a long day of swimming and running around yesterday I fell asleep downstairs in Mom and Dad's room. I was sooo tired, I just lay on my side like a horse, which is how I normally sleep. I must have been snoring, because I woke up with a start.

I fell back asleep, then my own snoring actually woke me up. I think I have sleep apnea.

So I read online today (why isn't there DogMD? Y'know, like WebMD?) that there are mouthguard type things I can use.

F that. I would just chew the thing like my Jolly Ball toy (RIP). And oxygen tanks? I think it would get wrapped in my collar in the middle of the night.

Well, at least I can rest assured that the Giants are playing better.

They took 3 out of 4 against the Phillies over the weekend. And our new pal Freddy Sanchez hit a two-run double in his debut Sunday. They beat Philly 7-3 Sunday and showed they can slip by a good team when it counts. It's definitely not about home runs, it's about manufacturing runs.

On the whole, this season has been all about winning close games 1-0 or 3-2, partly because the Giants have a mediocre offense. All that experience winning close games could really pay dividends if we get to the playoffs. That's the best case scenario.

Anyway, I'm going back online now to look for snoring cures. If anyone has any suggestions, please feel free to hit up the comments board below.

And no, those goddamn BreathRight strips do not work on my big nose. One of the cats mentioned that this morning. Stupid cats.

Jax

Pheeling good vs. the Phillies

Jax here, pacing around on a Friday.

I need a walk.

I was so happy to see the Giants beat the Phillies last night after sweeping the Pirates. Ryan Sadowski faces newly acquired Cliff Lee tonight, so we'll see what happens.

Pablo Sandoval was amazing last night. The best part of last night was a quick pregame interview with the Phils' Ryan Howard, who said something to the effect of "The Giants have pitching, that's what we know and that's what we respect when we come here."

Is that how other teams see the Giants? What a breakthrough from even two seasons ago. Back then, a guy like Ryan Howard would come in to AT&T and probably think, "Damn, it's cold up in this! This is July? I can't wait to destroy these geriatric ballplayers and get the hell out of this wind tunnel of a city."

Or something like that. Now it's like "Watch out for Cain and Lincecum." All right.

As for Freddy Sanchez: Giants Manager Bruce Bochy said he could be in the lineup as early as Saturday. I can't wait to see him play. This series against the reigning world champs is a big test for the Giants.

Do they have the mettle to get in the playoffs? The outcome of this series is going to send a message to other teams, one way or the other.

Go git 'em.

Jax

Manny and Big Papi are frauds

Hey everybody, Jax here. Chillaxin' in the garage.

Thanks for the comments and emails lately, I really appreciate the feedback. Sometimes it's lonely in this garage all day. Thank God for the A's road trip to the East Coast this last week. At least I could tap my nose to turn on the radio and catch those afternoon games on 860 AM ...

The New York Times is reporting that Manny Ramirez and David Ortiz tested positive for performance enhancing drugs in 2003.

Is this a big shocker? For Big Papi, sort of. I think it says something now that some users are slumping. Like Ortiz (now batting .224) and Jason Giambi (.193, out with injured quad). Ortiz photo by Jim Harrington/Photo.net.

As a dog who has been to the vet and been drugged, I feel a little sorry for these guys. But taking steroids is like selling your soul to the devil--you will pay.

On the Giants latest deals: They were fine moves. But callers on sports radio lately have floated the intriguing idea of bringing back Double B's Barry Bonds later this season to fill out the Giants' batting order. He has, of course, taken the fall for what seems like an entire "steroids era" of baseball. Would he slump now? I dunno, as long as his eyesight is good, I bet he can hit and hit for power. His talent is way beyond Ortiz or Giambi.

Wouldn't it be amazing to see BB return? Some fans want it, but "experts" say it's more trouble than it's worth, ruining the clubhouse atmosphere with hordes of media in every city and turning the whole thing into a circus, again.

Is Double B's even in shape? It would be a hell of a story if he came back in September, but I highly doubt Giants ownership would allow it. They hung on to Barry too long and finally cut ties.

Regardless of the politics, I think the Giants would almost surely win the pennant with him. Since he's a liability in right field (does anyone remember that?) could he suck it up and be a pinch hitter? I doubt it. Would he accept the league minimum pay? Doubt it.

That's all for now. Over the hum of the fan in the garage here, I can hear dogs barking in the valley. I want to get outside this garage and wrestle 'em. Or, maybe I'll just take a nap ...

Jax

Freddy Sanchez, welcome to SF

Hi dere, Jax here.

Freddy Sanchez is now a Giant, according to ESPN.

The Giants traded 20-year-old pitching prospect Tim Alderson for Sanchez. The only part of the story that worries me (I have to worry, right?) is the "tender left knee" part. Please, Freddy, tell us your best days are ahead of you.


Tell us you will contribute this season. Tell us you and Ryan Garko can get us to the playoffs. Sanchez photo again by homerderby.com.

I'm in the garage waiting for my daily walk. When will it happen? I just wait for the garage door to open.

Open Sesame ...

Jax

I'm really freakin' tired

Hey everybody, Jax here. I am just exhausted.

I went on this crazy walk with Brooke yesterday, I am just beat. This is what it's like in the garage here every weekday while they're at work. I've got this water-filled Cool Bed thing happening. I'm kind of bored here, but someone's got to pay for the dogfood ... At least I can listen to KNBR sports talk radio all day (see that radio?) and blog.

Anyway I watched Tim Lincecum pitch a complete game last night with a career best 15 strikeouts (it was in LOW-DEF just for the record). The Giants beat the Pirates 4-2.

I was a little confused last night because I blogged yesterday that Adam LaRoche had been traded from the Pirates to the Red Sox. Then I see "LaRoche" playing third base for the Pirates. That was ANDY LaRoche at third. ADAM LaRoche does indeed play for the Red Sox. Whew, I was gnawing on my tail about that a little bit during the game. Brooke was on the computer, I couldn't check ... I get anxious.

And you thought these Halladay/Holliday trade rumors were tough to follow. Geez.

You may have heard that the Giants acquired Ryan Garko yesterday, who will play first base. The Giants traded away ninth-rated LHP Scott Barnes--yes the same Scott Barnes who Stephen watched throw eight shutout innings against the Modesto Nuts July 22 (see photo). See you later, Scotty.

Garko is batting .285 and can hit lefties, so that's why he's here. I guess Pablo Sandoval plays 3B now? He did last night. I think Garko will be a good addition, and I wonder if that's it for trades.

BTW, how good is Lincecum? He's 11-3 with a 2.30 ERA. Pitched a complete game last night. His only weakness? Holding runners on base. He needs to work on that.

Let's hope the Giants can hold on tonight through the Barry Zito roller coaster and eek out a win. The Phillies series this weekend is going to be so, so much harder.

Peace out,

Jax

Day at the beach

Hey everybody, Jax here.

I had so much fun at the beach on Sunday. I was digging holes, chasing tennis balls, splashing around in the water ... it was great.

One team that didn't have a day at the beach on Sunday was the Giants, who are 3-7 in the last 10 games. Colorado was not kind to the Giants pitching staff, who spent the weekend getting lit up at Coors Field.

On tap tonight at AT&T Park are the Pirates. The Giants have Tim Lincecum on the mound.

One thing to watch out for is Pirates second baseman Freddy Sanchez, a former batting champ (2006) who Giants GM Brian Sabean is said to covet. (Sanchez photo by HomerDerby.com)

That trade scenario could happen, my dog sense tells me, because it would be relatively cheap and would upgrade the hitting at the 2B position. The Giants 2B Juan Uribe is batting .284, Freddy Sanchez is hitting .296. He is a career .300 hitter and Bucks ownership is motivated to sell. They are liquidating this year (standard) and just traded Adam LaRoche to Red Saaawx. Sanchez could come in a package deal with Pirates SS Jack Wilson, according to Andy Baggarly of the San Jose Mercury News.

Baggarly also reported that the Giants are not interested in the Blue Jays RHP Roy Halladay. The ace would cost the Giants too many prospects.

That's all for now. I want to go to the beach again!

Jax

Who moved my dish?

You know that book from a few years back, Who Moved My Cheese? It was about accepting change.

Sometimes, when my dish gets moved, I get perturbed. Actually, if anyone touches my food dish, I will know about it. Even if I'm in the garage and it's in the house, I know. Even if I'm sitting at a craps table in Vegas, I know. My ears perk up. I look around. Who moved my dish!?

One team that should make a move is the Giants. With the trade deadline looming in seven days, a lot of people have said the Giants need to make a trade or show some kind of signal that this team is good and has a shot to make the playoffs.

But even if no deals are made and the Giants can't get a bat or a difference-maker by then, Andy Baggarly said something on his blog that's worth repeating. He's the Giants beat writer for the San Jose Mercury News.

There’s one thing to remember about the July 31 trade deadline, however. It’s not really a deadline. In this economic climate, players making anything more than a McDonald’s shift leader are likely to pass through waivers. And players who aren’t on 40-man rosters aren’t subject to waivers, either. So the deadline is really more like August 31.

Everybody catch that? You don't have to understand all the legal mumbo jumbo, but understand that the Giants can afford to wheel and deal a little longer (assuming they are wheeling and dealing). For all the Giants fans calling KNBR and Damon Bruce wailing every night about how they need to make a trade--relax. Put the worrying and the hand-wringing and the pacing on hold for a sec.

Giants players like Randy Winn and Aaron Rowand have said they are not surprised at the team's strong record going in to the All Star Break. They say they are confident in the guys they have. But us baseball fans are just born worriers. It's like an essential trait.

It could be a helluva lot worse. We could be the A's, who just ran up the white flag on their season Thursday by trading Matt Holliday to the Cardinals. Holliday Photo by deconstructingthoughts.mlblogs.com.

The A's are 40-54, dead last in the AL West, 16 games back.

The Giants are 51-44 and 1 game back in the Wildcard to Colorado. Put that in your pipe, smoke it, then drink a beer.

Not to mention, the Giants have a chance to tie the Wildcard race tonight at Colorado with Matt Cain on the mound vs. Jason Hammel. First pitch, 6:10 p.m. PST.

Sit down, watch the game, and CHILLAX, Giants fans.

Jax

Bell tolls for Big Ben

Psssst!

I heard that Big Ben Roethlisberger of the Steelers has been accused of sexual assault in Lake Tahoe. A civil case has been filed against him. Photo by Hakester/MySpace.

What, you haven't heard it on ESPN? Well there's a lot of suspicion on our local sports talk radio that ESPN is burying it because ABC/ESPN has a new reality show debuting Aug. 8 that features Ben and Shaquille O'Neal. The show is called "Shaq Vs." and it's going forward, ABC said.

Does ESPN cater too much to athletes? If Terrell Owens or Chad Johnson had been accused of this, would they have given him the benefit of the doubt? I don't think so.

Ed Werder would be out there in a jiffy. ESPN apparently said they hadn't reported it because no criminal charges had been filed. That didn't stop them in some other cases.
That's all for the rumor mill today. I'm going back to sleep.

Goodnight,

Jax

We really need HD

Look at this little contraption, kids. This is the TV that I watch Giants games on. It's nostalgic of the 90's it's so old.

I can barely tell balls from strikes on this thing because IT'S IN LOW DEF. Was that a foul ball? Did he trap that ball in left field or catch it? I have no idea, folks.

Usually I'm listening to games on the radio in the garage, which might have even more "def" than the TV, because at least I can picture that backdoor slider or big hit of the wall. Here, I can see nothing. (Also I am colorblind, but that's beside the point. My sense of smell is impeccable.)

We are lucky enough to have ESPN's Jon Miller do our local radio and TV Giants games (except Sunday nights) and he is one of the best in the business. He could wax poetic for hours about all kinds of Bay Area baseball history: the San Francisco Seals, the New York Giants moving to San Francisco ...

Oh man. It's still pretty hot here. I need a shave. Maybe after this nap ...

Jax

Knuckleballs, knuckle bones

Hey everybody, Jax here.

I just love knuckle bones. They're so tasty and salty. I've been accused of being salty too, like this morning, when I didn't want to go on a walk. I just wanted to sleep. But that's my breed, ya know, eat and sleep.

So the Giants are not doing that great since the All Star break. They lost two games and won one in Pittsburgh over the weekend, now they're in Atlanta with Jonathan Sanchez on the mound for his first start since the no hitter.

Watching the media and fans gush about Sanchez after his no hitter was a lot like watching the media and fans gush about Michael Jackson after his death. Sure, he made some mistakes, but now he's a hero! Nevermind all the previous bashing ...

Speaking of bashing, I rule at backgammon. Don't tell Stephen, but I have this set of dice that has extra sixes on them. Instead of 1 dot it's got an extra 6 dot side. Brilliant, I know! Except I think he was getting on to me when I beat him four times in a row and I kept getting double sixes.

He was like "huh, that's funny, double sixes again." And I'm like "must be beginners' luck."

I don't think he bought it.

When he got back Saturday night (it's still just us in the house, Brooke is gone) he showed me photos of his trip to the San Jose Giants game on July 18 vs. the Modesto Nuts at SJ Municipal Stadium. The Giants won 1-0 in two hours. Fast. He let me post some of the pictures here:


Photos courtesy Stephen Baxter and Tom King. That's LHP Scott Barnes on the mound, the ninth rated prospect in the Giants' burgeoning farm system.


That's about it for now. Keep it real.

Jax

Sanchy throws a no-no

Unbelievable.

Jax here, up late! Jonathan Sanchez just threw a no hitter. For a guy who was struggling all season, sent to the bullpen, I can't believe he just did that.(Photo by Michael Maloney/San Francisco Chronicle)

His legs are more compact in his windup, and I guess that was the key (pointed out on TV). That and total focus. He's never even thrown a complete game!

Oh man. I gotta drink some water out of my bowl and go to bed. I was just gnawing on this bone all night watching this. I was on the couch with Stephen, making a total mess, drooling ... It was not pretty. But wow. Jonathan. I just hope the confidence stays for good.

And his trade value has never been higher ...

Jax

On Deck: Padres

Hey everybody, King Jax here.

First of all, I said Ryan Sudowski the other day, it's Sadowski, just for the record. Photo by Sacramento Bee.

Second, the Giants start a four-game series with the Padres tonight, and thank Allah they recently traded away Scott Hairston to the A's. That guy was just a menace to Giants pitching. Let's hope Tim Lincecum (9-2, 2.23 ERA, Cy Young 2009 candidate) can outlast RHP Josh Geer (1-3, 5.46 ERA) tonight.

The Friars have lost four in a row and are in the cellar of the NL West, so hopefully we can handle them. But lord knows the last few trips down there have been, um, bad. The Giants are second in the NL West and lead the wildcard race.

San Jose's own Kevin Frandsen got called up again to the Giants, filling in for Juan Uribe at second base. I'm sure Frandsen is a nice guy and all, but the guy just doesn't have any one tool that is going to make him last in the Bigs.

As Dave Fleming put it: he's not fast, his arm is OK, he doesn't hit for average, he doesn't hit for power, his fielding is OK.

Does this sound like superstar? Um, no. Speaking of young guys, I like the improvement I've seen in Nate Schierholtz (who is fast and can hit) a lot more than Frandsen. And Ishikawa has done some good things at first base. Pablo Sandoval, obviously, is a keeper. You have until 1 p.m. PST Thursday to vote for him in the All Star Game.

That's about it. Mom left today for Wisconsin, so it's just the boys at the house. I can't wait to watch the game, sit on the couch and go downstairs and sneak some catfood now and then. MMMMMmmmm.

Jax

OK, Gin!

Hey everybody, Jax here.
Stephen accused me of cheating at cards yesterday. Like I would cheat at Gin.

We were sitting on the couch and Stephen dealt my hand. I looked at the cards and I'm like "Gin!" He said, "Jax, how could you possibly have gin, I just dealt." And I'm like, "I dunno, you should have shuffled better."

OK, so I had a second deck in my fur, so what? It was a stupid game anyway... Then I took a nap.

Speaking of games, how 'bout them Giants! They won their last two games and are looking to sweep the Fish today at AT&T. The bad news is Randy Johnson is out for 4 to 8 weeks plus (left shoulder strain). This falls during the All Star Break, which is good, but I worry about Jonathan Sanchez starting again. It's like he has bad Juju or something.

In other news, this is your last chance to vote for Pablo (Kung Fu Panda) Sandoval for the All Star Game.

Voting closes at 1 p.m. PST on Thusday July 9. Enter your email address then you can vote like 100 times. He is in a tight race with Shane "The Flyin' Hawaiian" Victorino of the Phillies, so every vote counts. Sandoval has held slim margins the last two days, according to MLB dot com.

Victorino, who is from Maui, is probably going to get strong support since every islander with even a vague interest in baseball is voting right now. They're more into this than you might think.

MMMMmmm, a Pina Colada sounds nice ...

Jax

VOTE FOR PABLO SANDOVAL!

I just voted like 5 times. Last minute ALL STAR pick! Vote as much as you want. Stuff the box!

Shoulder of meat

Hey everybody, Jax here, chillaxin' on the deck.

Everything's cool here. I've been watching the Giants kick some butt lately, with shutouts, Lincecum's complete game shutouts, and what do you know we're on top of the Wildcard race.

I can't tell you how much fun it was watching the Gigantes beat up on the Cardinals for a few games, then whip Houston 9-0 on Saturday. The only problem is Randy Johnson strained his shoulder on Sunday and he might be out of the rotation for a little while, MRI pending today.

The Giants finally came to their senses and made Jonathan Sanchez a reliever--not a moment too soon. They brought up this guy Sudowski (dubbed The Big Sudowski) and he has been good. Now with Johnson hurt, we may have to bring Sanchez back as a starter or, better yet, give this guy Joe Martinez another shot.

Giants fans might remember Martinez as the guy who took a line drive off his cranium in second game of the season, and he has been recovering since. He is playing in Triple A Fresno now.

Jax

'A' nother nice win

Hey guys, Jax here.

It was great to see the Giants pull it out against the A's last night in Oakland. The place was packed and Tim Lincecum went the distance after struggling through the sixth and seventh innings.

Luckily I didn't get to just see the box score, we watched a lot of the game on TV! Thank God "So You Think You Can Dance" wasn't on--that totally ruins my baseball watching. One of these days I'm just going to snatch that remote with my teeth and change it back to baseball. They'll probably think it's cute!

Amyway, last night in Oakland there were so many Giants fans, chanting "Let's go Gi-ants" and "Beat L.A." I love it. Especially after they violated us last year when A's fans took over AT&T Park. Last night, Timmy (7-2, 2.57 ERA) just had the grit to not worry about letting a few guys on base. Announcer Mike Krukow had a great way to describe Timmy's change-up:

"What is hitting? Timing. What is pitching? Upsetting the hitter's timing," Kruk said. Timmy's change ups and curveballs were on point, then he just blows by batters with a 96 mph fastball. We're witnessing something really special here, and it's been two years in the bigs, so it's not just facing batters who haven't figured him out yet. He's just that good.

Could it by Cy Young No. 2?

I'm feeling pretty good, I've been on deer patrol and taking a leak on some trees etc. My walks have been standard lately, a lot of sniffing going on. I'm kind of lazy, as usual.

I'm looking forward to this Giants road trip to Milwaukee and St. Louis, especially the earlier start times. I'm just sitting in the garage here, so why not start the games in the afternoon, right?

Jax

Big hike

Hey guys, Jax here. The Giants lost to the A's last night because they couldn't score any runs. News flash.

Giants GM Brian Sabean has told reporters that the team will probably wait until closer to the non-waiver trade deadline (July 31) to make any moves. Let's hope it involves Jonathan Sanchez.

I'm feeling a lot better. No more ear problems or anything else. Yesterday I went on the hike to end all hikes with Brooke. We walked on trails that became no trails, we hiked through poison oak, we ran down to a reservoir and I jumped in the water with all these people on boats watching me. I swam like halfway across this huge lake, it was great. Even Brooke waded across part of the lake with her cell phone held out of the water.

I have no idea what she was doing, but I had a blast. I slept so well last night, just exhausted.

Anyway, I hope the Giants can win the rest of the games against the A's. Cause then they start a road trip to Milwuakee and St. Louis, where they just might get pounded.

Adios,

Jax

I hate the vet

Hey everybody, Jax here.

I know it's been a while since my last post, I've been busy. I had to go to the vet yesterday because Brooke thought I had an STD. It turns out it's totally normal to have a little discharge happening down there, who knew?

I thought I got it from Chili, or Healey, or whatever his name is. And the vet put this liquid in my ears to dry them out, one of them was kind of infected. Damn floppy ears...

Anyway the Giants have been struggling lately but at least they're above .500. They could make a real run for the Wildcard if they can make some savvy trades. Even Giants Manager Bruce Bochy seems tired of pumping up Jonathan Sanchez (2-7, 5.43 ERA). There is speculation he was just talking him up to raise his trade value, but that time has passed. He's just a headcase, like I've been saying for months.

I'm not sure what team would want him unless he was packaged with a Giants prospect like Buster Posey or Madison Baumgartner. Maybe Sanchez could become a reliever? They can't send him down to Class AAA ball because another team could snatch him on waivers, so the Giants are kind of stuck.

The question is whether the Giants should go for it this year and get a bat or two, or just slog it out and hope that they build to a division title next season. Patience is hard!

Hopefully the Giants can get some Ws from the Rangers, who are in town this weekend. Meanwhile, I'll be picking foxtails out of my fur, eating, snoring, and shaking my head a lot to try to get the water out of my ears. I think I woke up 25 times last night shaking the shit out of my ears.

I hate the stupid vet.

Adios,

Jax

Reach for the stars, or the food

Hey everybody, Jax here.

Not a lot going on today, the Giants are playing the Washington Nationals tonight with Tim Lincecum on the mound against some guy named Craig Stammen.

The Nationals starting pitchers are looking for their first win, so I'm hoping the Gigantes can get a few hits and win some games here. The National are also DFL in the National League East, so ... let's start this road trip off right.

I've been jumping on the kitchen counter lately for food, and generally being a horse's ass by chasing cats, barking at deer, not coming when I'm called ... No one cares though, because I'm so darn cute. Even at 125 lb.

I've learned that everything can be cured with a few big face licks. That's right.

Adios,

Jax

I love Carlos Zambrano

Carlos Zambrano is one of my favorite players. The guy gets so fired up sometimes! He's an animal, like me. Check out this clip of him getting tossed on Wednesday. He tries to toss the umpire!

Then he chucks the ball into the stands and takes a bat to an innocent drink dispenser in the dugout. He da man! The man with a six-game suspension, it turns out.

Jax

Lazy day

Hey everybody, Jax here.

Things are good. We listened to the Giants beat the Braves yesterday on the radio. I was lying under a tree in the shade, it was great. Hopefully the Giants can win tonight with Lincecum starting.

Travis Ishikawa (nickname: Eeesh) hit his first dinger of the year on Monday, a three run homer just days after Jesus Guzman was called up from Triple A to try to take his position. Coincidence? The world may never know.

I'm going to hibernate in the garage now.

Adios

Jax

Well, that wasn't fun

Forget it. Playing the Padres just doesn't work, even with Tim Lincecum on the mound. On to the Mariners.

Randy Johnson will start tonight in Seattle, chasing his 300th win. From what I hear, the road to 300 is already starting to be a drag for all involved. Johnson has been giving all kinds of interviews about this feat he hasn't done yet, he spent an afternoon with a Sports Illustrated scribe, he's flying his family out to Seattle for the series ... He has indicated that he just wants to get the thing over with. Photo by Jed Jacobsohn/Getty Images.

The 6'10" lefty sits at 298 wins, but his stuff hasn't been the greatest lately. Baseball is obsessed with milestones, but given the wins and losses for pitchers is a fairly useless stat, what's all the fuss about? I mean, I get that R.J. (Don't call him Big Unit) is a hall of famer, I get that his longevity is amazing, but how many of those losses were because he got no run support? How many runs did he give up in his wins?

Speaking of useless stats, I heard Texas Rangers Club President Nolan Ryan is calling bullsh*t on pitch counts. Too many managers are pulling starters when their pitch count gets in the 80s or 90s to "protect their investment," even if the guy is still getting guys out.

Ryan calls it an experiment, I call it a return to common sense. Barry Zito, of all people, pitched a complete game the other night for the Giants, and C.C. Sabathia has pitched like 10 complete games from last season to now. You don't need to be as huge as Sabathia (and God knows he's not perfect), but if pitchers keep keep nailing strikes, let them play. They're ballplayers! Just give the catcher a rest now and then. Alot of baseball is about numbers, but a manager has to go with his gut sometimes.



Speaking of guts, at about 6:30 this morning I was snoring peacefully downstairs when I had to heave my guts all over the floor again. I ate a dixie cup or something out of the trash and it came back out. Whew, I do feel a lot better now.

Those bastards are barbecuing again. I hope I can get a piece of that ...

Jax

Padres stink

Hey everybody, Jax here, blogging on the deck for a change.

The only thing worse than getting beat by the Padres is watching a perfectly good complete game by Barry Zito go to waste. Last night Scott Hairston continued to own the Giants with two walks, a hit and a home run to down the Giants 2-1. Hairston photo by Pictopia.com.

The Padres are barely out of the NL West cellar (don't worry, it's May) and I hope to God the Giants can win the rest of the series. Unfortunately, we've got Jonathan Sanchez starting tonight, who is a head case if I ever saw one. This guy will be lights out for an inning, then completely lose his cool and walk like five guys and just swear at himself on the mound. He has decent stuff, but I can tell just by watching him on TV when he gets frustrated and has no command. Imagine what the hitters can tell!

He is the like the opposite of Andy Pettite, who's got that hat pulled down so low you wonder how he can see at all. Sanchez (or "Sanchy" as Giants Manager Bruce Bochy likes to call him) has been rumored for a trade.

However, SF Chronicle Giants beat writer Henry Schulman pointed out on KNBR last night that May is no time to trade anyone--especially with Sanchy's stock sinking. The time to trade is closer to the trade deadline. Teams will be more desperate and the Giants can get a better deal to trade him for a hitter. Who knows, maybe the Giants will be in contention. They're second in the NL West right now, 7 1/2 games back. Maybe the wildcard is doable.

The Giants also can't afford to lose Sanchy right now because their next best starting pitcher is Madison Bumgarner, who is a prospect with exactly one start so far in Double A. He has a lot of hype surrounding him, but still.

So, in other words, we're in for Headcase Sanchez tonight. I hope this guy doesn't play poker--he'd lose his shirt.

Jax

Feast

Oh man. I had such a good breakfast of cat food this morning. It was so tasty. I'm not supposed to eat that stuff, and I get scolded when I do, but it was sooooo worth it. It's so moist and delicious, and a big bowl of it was just sitting in Brooke's closet like a forgotten candy bar. After a meal like that, I like to have a big bowl of water (see photo) and light up a nice cigar.

Speaking of getting lit up, that's pretty much what happened to Giants closer Brian Wilson last night in the top of the ninth inning. The Mets took a 4-4 tie and cranked out 3 more runs to win the game 7-4. It wasn't all Wilson's fault, but what a deflating defeat. Wilson photo by Lisa Blumenfeld/Getty Images.

The Giants have the weekend games to redeem themselves, and on Saturday Randy Johnson is facing Johan Santana. Sunday's game is on ESPN at 5 p.m. PST. Lick it up.

Jax

My shearing, Panda's walkoff

Baaaaa.

Since we're easing in to summer and I was looking like a black sheep, I got sheared on Monday. I feel so much cooler now, like a new dog. Hello, summer, and Thank You Brooke.

Panda (Pablo Sandoval) hit a three-run jack over the left field wall at AT&T last night to beat the Nationals 9-7. It was a helluva hit, and it puts the Giants in a position to sweep Washington. Photo by Stiv.com.

Hey, I know it's just the Nationals, but there's no degree of difficulty points we're going for here. The Giants are just trying to win some games. By the way, Pablo bats switch and he was hitting right handed when he launched that one in to the seats. Long live Panda!

Jax

Manny, Brian Wilson, death march hikes ...

OK, so I didn't exactly break the news that Man-Ram tested positive for HCG, the female fertility drug used to mask steroids. But like Damon Bruce of SportsPhone680 said, it's not a sad day for baseball. It's an ordinary day for baseball.

This stuff is common.

Now, that out of the way, too bad the suspension won't last more than 50 games. Maybe Manny will get fat and complacent in the downtime, that would be great. Then maybe the Giants can get a handle on the NL West. Right now the Giants are 4 1/2 games back to the Dodgers, even though we took 2 out of 3 from them in Chavez Ravine this weekend. I listened to Sunday's game on the radio in the shade, next to Stephen, who totally stole my hammock. He had a beer and I had some ice cubes in my water dish. We were exhausted from work, so it was great to just chill and listen to the game go into 13 innings. And, by the way, I'm hot here in this fur coat I can't take off. Can somebody shave me already?

The only other news (read: gossip) that came out the game was that Giants Closer Brian Wilson apparently got a photo sent to his cell phone from the Dodgers' Casey Blake. The photo showed Blake mocking Wilson with his arms crossed and fingers pointed, the way Wilson does after every save to honor his dead father and his Christianity. So Blake, really classy buddy. F-ing Dodgers.

Between that and Dodger fans heckling Aaron Rowand in center field, the rivalry is alive and well. Our pitchers cannot stop Juan Pierre, but at least we won the series.
The Giants have won or split their last 8 series, and Manager Bruce Bochy said that would be the goal going in to each series, so I think the Giants are doing OK. The next month is going to be key though. They face the Nationals, who are actually hot right now, then the Mets, then at San Diego.

Let's go Giants.

Jax