Renteria is a Giant

Hola, Jax here en el Garage. I'm listening to Spanish lessons on tape here. Kinda bored.

Anyway, the Giants signed Edgar Renteria to replace SS Omar Vizquel. Hopefully he isn't on a downward spiral and can put up numbers more like 2007 (.332 avg) than in 2008 (.270). (Renteria photo: hollywoodcollectibles.com, and yes, he's been with the Red Sox, Braves, Marlins ... Jorge Cantu photo www.sportsillustrated.cnn.com)

Whatever. I just hope Giants GM Brian Sabean doesn't make his big off-season signing CC Sabathia. Last year was a fluke with the Brewers. This guy needs to go a diet yesterday (6-7, 290lb), and pitching is not the problem on the Giants at the moment.

Do I need to spell it out? G.E.T. A. B.A.T.
The rumor is that mediocre Giants pitcher Jonathan Sanchez will be traded for the Marlins' Jorge Cantu. Go for it.

Cantu is 26, batted .277 and could be relatively cheap. Not that the Giants would stoop to actually driving a hard bargain. They seem to shower players with money (Exhibit A: Barry Zito) and go for players just past their prime. Basically the oppposite approach to Billy Beane's A's.

Please let there be a hitter in the Giants future.

Adios, muchachos, y Feliz Navidad.

Jax

NFL: No Fun League?

Hey folks, Jax here, chillin' in the garage. Is it Thanksgiving yet?

Some people have asked me if I'm going to follow pro football now that baseball season is over, and I could give it a shot. Here's an, um, interesting blog post from Washington Redskins Tight End Chris Cooley (at right, photo: redskins.com). Just in case you thought football players weren't as juvenile, homoerotic (and funny) as baseball players at times, his own blog post is a testament to what happens behind the scenes on some teams. And yes, it involves "air humping." Who says the NFL is the No Fun League?

I have a feeling the post is going to get pulled from the site really soon once a PR person finds it, so I have copied and pasted it below. A sports talk radio guy could barely get through reading it today without bursting out laughing. Enjoy.

Official Website of Chris Cooley
Monday, November 24, 2008
Seattle

There is no better way to celebrate a win than getting grabbed and punched in the balls by a bunch of offensive lineman on the bus. Lesson learned though, if you go back and try to mess with one of them then the rest are gonna gang up on ya. To their defense, I guess I kind of had it coming. Last Thursday in practice we were working on our run game and one of our guys fell down as the play ended. I had just finished off my block and turned back to see him wallowing around on his hands and knees trying to get back to his feet. I don't really know why, but I thought it would be funny as hell to air hump him in while he was down, maybe catch it on the end of the film clip to have something to laugh about in meetings later that afternoon. I was even nice enough to make sure he wasn't really hurt before I moved in behind him. As I finished off and made my way back to the huddle I heard about half the team erupt in laughter, really I didn't expect any reaction, but apparently it was noticed by everyone.

So, back to the bus, when the game ends I usually load up on bus #2 and move towards the back with the offensive line, Yoder, and the kickers. Kind of our little after the game club. After games we usually have to sit on the bus and wait for a half hour or so before all the interviews are done and the gear gets loaded up to take to the airport and then it's usually another half an hour before we get to the plane. So we get some quality time to spend together, especially after a win. After Sunday nights game I was getting all kinds of hell about what was going to happen to me when I fell asleep on the plane due to the whole air humping thing. You know, asses on your face, dicks drawn on you forehead, or the very popular picture of you sleeping with someone's balls touching you then getting the photo texted to your phone in the morning prank. So I went back to entertain a little pre-plane wrestling match and take care of business. Before I knew it I was held down on the floor being manhandled and punched in the crotch, oh yea, I got air humped in retaliation while I was down too. Yea, we are a bunch of 14 year olds, at least until we get back home to our families and then we mature to at least 17.

After all the shenanigans we had a good laugh and then I proceeded to remain awake the entire flight home. It's hilarious to think about how someone may explain the antics on the bus to a human resources director at a normal workplace. Can you imagine a some dude at an accounting firm complaining about all his fellow workers pinning him down in a cubicle and punching his nuts? That's assault brother! And we just laugh about it like a bunch of idiots.

Well enough of the bullshit. I think everyone knew that this week's game was a must win to keep any kind of pace with the rest of the NFC. Let's not even talk about winning our division, I mean, it will probably take 11 wins just to get into a wild card spot. Right now everyone is winning games and we couldn't afford to drop another one. Seattle was a tough team and a crazy ass place to play, I think that's all I have to say. It was a huge win!
Posted by Chris Cooley at 4:50 PM 22 comments
Labels: Chris Cooley, Random Crazy, Seattle, Washington Redskins

Speaking of free agents

Here's a list of some candidates. Who might look good in a Giants uniform?

Jax

Next season

Hey everybody, Jax here, chillin' in the garage.

Things have wound down a little around here. I've been a little more careful with my constitution, and I'm not chasing Snowflake (the neighbors' dog) off in to their yard. Gosh it was fun to poop there. That was really a hoot. Now when I go over there this shocker things zaps me when I cross the line to their yard. I don't get it.

Back to baseball ... The Giants need a bat. Here's who Giants GM Brian Sabean might get for a free agent this off season. He has a tendency to pick up at least one each off season, so get ready for an infielder with a bat. I wonder if that will be enough to contend for the NL West. And if I were Matt Cain or Tim Lincecum, I'd be kind of restless for some damn run support. Let's make 2009 count, ya bastards.

Here's a photo of Pablo Sandoval, a catcher and another prospect the Giants brought up from their Class A team, the San Jose Giants. I hope Pablo and Big Money Bengie Molina have a spirited rivalry next season behind home plate. Photo credit: sjgiants.com.

Later,

Jax

Tim-may did it!

Hooray! San Francisco's own Tim Lincecum won the NL Cy Young Award today, in a landslide! I really hope this gives a boost to the Giants next season. He's earned his nickname "The Franchise" and we have got to lock this guy up long term. This makes Giants GM Brian Sabean look good, makes the team more attractive to prospects, maybe it'll make free agents look at the Giants as more a contender. What an achievement! Can't wait til next season. Photo: Associated Press.

Jax

Bush deserves a third term ... in prison

The World Series is over, the Phillies won, and we will have new winners and losers on Nov. 4.
It's Election Day, and nobody cares about my politics, so I won't bother. Here's are my votes for the next four years.

1. More baseball, less commissioner.
Can we vote MLB Commissioner Bud Selig out of office? Why not? I think people ought to write in their choices on the next All Star ballot. Ditch this home run replay stuff, ditch QuesTec, ditch the All Star game result having anything to do with the World Series. How many commissioners of major sports are not trained in labor law, but were once used car salesman. I only know of one, Bud.

2. Stop vibrating and shocking my neck.
So I went potty a few times on neighbor John's yard. So what? I didn't know it was bad. Now Mom and Dad set up this line across our yards, and every time I try to cross it I get shocked or vibrated by my collar. What the hey? Do I look like a wild animal here? I'm just trying to take a crap. I was so tired from running around with the dogs this weekend I went to the fence, got shocked, then just moped home like a Panda. WTF.

3. Chasing cats should be legal. It's really fun, and I never catch them anyway, so who gives a damn. Just let me terrify cats.

More on the Giants next post. The photo's from MLB.com.

Jax

I told you it would be weird

Weirdness at the World Series. Hi guys, Jax here, just chilling out in the garage. The Tennessee Titans are 7-0 and everybody's talking about the World Series. (Photo from AFP.)

I think MLB Commish Bud Selig made a deal with Mother Nature to get the rain to come down to stir interest in this World Series, which has had record low TV ratings.

Actually, it is unlikely that Selig has Nature on speed dial--he has trouble communicating here on Earth. Before the game, Selig said there was no way the game would be cut short because of rain. If there were a rain delay, it would be delayed for as long as it took. Well, it would have been the longest rain delay in history--2 days plus.

Tied at 2-2, with rain pouring down in the middle of the sixth inning, the game was suspended until Tuesday night in Philly. Then I hear on the radio Tuesday the game will not be played tonight because of rain and 40 mph gusts, delaying it to Wednesday at 8 p.m. EST.

A Philadelphia resident wrote an email to the Dan Patrick radio show today. Paraphrasing:

There are many lovely autumn afternoons that turn in to stormy evenings here in Philadelphia. If the game were played in the afternoon, as they were in the past so children and adults would not have to stay up late, this wouldn't have happened. Major League Baseball was just responding to its pimp, FOX, which insists on games being played later in the day to maximize TV viewers. That means more ad revenue. Nevermind that both teams are from the East Coast--us fans get the shaft.

Dan Patrick's response: The game never should have started with the ominous weather forecast. Why not delay the game preemptively? What were they thinking? And why did Selig say before the game they would play until it was done? If the score had not been tied, and it was called with a 2-1 score in the Phillies' favor, the rules say 5 innings is a full game.

What do I think? I'm a dog, OK. I just learned to pee on the right bush this week.

I was looking forward to a nice little game that would have completed innings 6 through 9 tonight here at 5 p.m. PST. And by the way, it's about 78 degrees and sunny here. I guess I will have to wait until Thursday. Go Rays. If the Rays go on to win it, get ready for riots in Philly.

Jax

Thoughts on the Trop

Hey gang, Jax in FX--

World Series Game 1 wasn't exactly what I hoped for with a Phillies win, but there were some things I appreciated.

1. The angles. One good part of Tropicana Field is that the camera that shows the mound and home plate is shot from so high in center field that it has a downward angle--blocking all the jerks on their cell phones behind home plate. Not only that, but the scoreboard banner that Fox uses on top blots out the entire front row of seats, leaving just baseball and a single ad banner to the left of home plate. It's great. Nobody's waving their arms franticaly or delivering $10 hot dogs, it's just baseball. It kinda reminds me of the Houston Astrodome with the turf and everything.

2. Pass the mic. Also, I liked how they had a mic on Rays Manager Joe Maddon during that balk. He yelled "That was a balk, that was bullshit," and a few million people heard him.

3. I think Tim McCarver is a jackass.

4. Fox Trax. It's that strike zone graphic they show to review pitches that looks like the K-Zone on ESPN but more ghetto. Anyway, I liked how the graphic showed balls that were called strikes and strikes that were called balls. Eat that, QuesTec.

5. Curt Schilling got it right on his blog. Phillies 1, Rays 0.

Get ready for teal

Hey everybody, Jax here, just chillin' here in the garage.

Old school baseball fans really wanted a Dodgers-Red Sox World Series. To them I say: Eat it.

Fall baseball doesn't have to be about Fenway Park and those dolts in Chavez Ravine. Bring on The Bank and The Trop. I'm rooting for the Rays, teal uniforms and crazy ceiling in the Trop and all. They have the heart to do this, and I think the Phillies' layoff will hurt them.

They say this will be the least watched World Series in history. I don't give a damn.

Game 1 starts tonight!

Carlos Pena has a blog

Rays first baseman Carlos Pena (at right with Manager Joe Maddon, mlb.com) has been keeping a blog, and he said it wasn't the first time he had made a big statement at Fenway Park -- he played there all the time in his imagination.

This is so cool. When I lived in Haverhill growing up in Boston, we used to live at kind of a corner, so it looked like a baseball stadium. We would pick one of the corners to be home plate. And then we would hit up against the house that was right in front of us, with plastic balls, obviously, because we would have broken all the windows otherwise.

My brothers and I used to play, and we used to hit so many home runs over the Green Monster in our minds. "Ah, home run over the Green Monster, yeah!" And I was doing that when I was 13, after I got to this country from the Dominican Republic for the first time.

And all this was a dream, that's all it was. And the next thing you know, I'm still doing it at 30 years old, and actually doing it -- really doing it. Tonight's home run, last night's home run, those were like a dream -- something I'd done before in my mind.

The Rays play the Phillies at the Trop on Wednesday at 5 p.m. PST.

Schadenfreude

Schadenfreude SHa-den-FROID. noun. definition: pleasure derived from another person's misfortune.

I had a big case of Schadenfreude last night when the Dodgers went down in flames at Dodger Stadium to the Phillies. It was even better than if they hadn't made the playoffs. As a Giants fan, it was the greatest. That's Manny at right, of course, having Manny problems in Game 3 (credit: Washington Post).

Callers on Damon Bruce's excellent Sportsphone 680 show last night were going bananas about the Dodgers losing. Also, former Giant Pedro "Pete Happy" Feliz is headed to the World Series wearing a Phillies uniform. This, a guy who made an art of the K during his time as a Giant, swinging at balls in the dirt daily. Life is not fair, especially for former Phillie Aaron "I broke my nose for that team" Rowand. Life is not fair.

Now we have Charlie Manuel's gol-dang Phillies versus what looks to be a firing-on-all-cylinders Rays in the World Series. The Bank and the Trop are the venues. What a way to finish a weird 2008. I can't wait until an "instant" replay home run decides the whole thing.

The unlikely World Series

Go Rays, go Phillies.

How much fun is it see the BoSox go down? I'll jump on that Rays bandwagon. Worst to first. Live it up! Go Rays!

Check out the Rays Index for latest info.

Scotty Kazmir (right, mlb.com) pitches next.

In da house

Stephen and I had to paint a fence yesterday, so we listened to the end of the Phillies-Dodgers game on the radio and a lot of the Rays-Red Sox game before we switched to TV. I just lounged outside my dog house while he painted my fence. We were bonding. (see photo)

The Red Sox game was called by Jon Miller and Joe Morgan, and I really don't like Joe Morgan's style because he repeats things like eight times because he has nothing else to say. Just as a "for instance" (that's Palin talk, we're all getting accents, eh) Joe Morgan said that Red Sox starter Daisuke Matsuzaka often has bad command of his pitches until he gets in a jam and pitches out of it.

"So, Dice-K will throw pitches that aren't even close, then he'll pitch out of it."
"Dice-K is out of the strike zone, again, but then when he needs to throw strikes, he can."
"That's the thing about Dice-K, he just throws strikes when he has to."
"Dice-K really can't command his pitches, but somehow he strikes out batters."
"There goes Dice-K again, digging himself a hole then throwing strikes."
"I really don't like these Japanese guys coming over here and taking American jobs on the mound."

OK, so he didn't really say that last one, but you get the idea. Isn't there anything else going on in the game? Is there no other storyline?




That's Joe Morgan, left, and Daisuke Matsuzaka, right.
At least Jon Miller is telling me about the crazy dimensions of Tropicana Field, describing the length to the outfield walls and the short height of the fences.

And don't even get me started on Fox's Tim McCarver.

Woof

Jax

The Angels were robbed

Here's that play from the ALDS the other day. Because it was a controversial call involving a catcher, I'm just surprised A.J. Pierzynski wasn't there.

Core scores

This has nothing to do with baseball, but I thought everyone should know about the Core Score. Surfing Magazine came up with this list a few months ago, and they have added to the list each month. It's just a general rating for your life about how "core" you are. It's centered on surfing, but you get the idea. Blogging, incidently, is really bad for your core score.

Increase Your Core Score
beards
flannels
not having a cell phone
budweiser cans
no-look paddle outs
stitches
surfing alone
sleeping in your car
black coffee
sneaking in (anywhere)
running (but not for exercise)
not coming home
overtime
public radio
sailing alone
immigration
road sodas
gutters
hands-free barrels
train-hopping
on the rocks
last call
change
the pill
driving to Cabo
cheating
peeing outdoors


Decrease Your Core Score
walking your girlfriend's dog
faux-hawks
changing in a towel robe
salads
fur-lined boots
slacks
blogging
tanning
puka shell necklaces
Valentine's Day
drop knee
t-shirts with phrases
excessive sunscreen
getting sick
sleeping pills
beach chairs
gift baskets
Oprah
unusual hats
the surfing rulebook
tofu
worrying about gas prices
frozen yogurt
soundtracks
reality television
convertibles
plagiarism

Where do you stand?

Jax

Ray day

This story is way better than whatever I would have written today, so just read that instead. Go Rays!!!!

yawn,

Jax

Lay day

No baseball today, Tuesday. It's kind of a weird feeling. Everybody's looking for a Dodgers-Red Sox World Series. To see Manny "Man Ram" Ramirez back to face his former team at Fenway, Joe Torre back without a Yankees uniform on to beat the Red Sox. It would be hard not to root for L.A. ... What's a Giants fan to do? Except F around with his blog colors ...

I had fun yesterday when Victor the painter came by. He always lets me lick his face. I guess I got inspired by his painting prowess.

Stay cool,

Jax

Close finish

Hi folks, Jax here, just chillin' today.

Watching the Angels slug it out in 12 innings Sunday night was worth it, and I'm glad they came through to silence Fenway Park. Turning Jared Weaver into a closer was a stroke of genius, Mike Scioscia (right-credit mlb.com). Occasionally, Angels Manager Scioscia takes off his cap in the dugout and you can see he's losing his hair. I would too if I had the best players in baseball and they're getting waxed by the Red Sox (with an injured ace).

Which brings us to our loyalties. So, the Giants are done for the year, and some fans here want to root for the National League West team still in it. OK, that means the Dodgers, which doesn't, um, exactly sit well with Giants fans who are used to chanting "Beat L.A." at the mere sight of a Dodgers cap in the ballpark.

KNBR-AM 680 host extraordinaire Gary Radnich went so far as to say he was rooting for the Dodgers(!) in their series against the Cubs, in part to show that the NL West was stronger than everyone had thought. Radnich's phone lines lit up like a slot machine at Harrah's. "How could you?" they asked ...

If it's a Dodgers/Red Sox World Series, that would be a helluva series and it would be funny since so many "experts" wrote off the NL West for months. That doesn't mean I'm worshipping Vin Scully and wearing Dodger Blue or anything.

We have Game 4 of Angels vs. Red Sox tonight, and White Sox vs. Rays has already started in Chicago. The Phillies and Dodgers play Thursday for the National League Pennant. Go Phillies.

Speaking of Phillies, Stephen and I were cleaning up the yard Sunday when I showed him where I've been crapping for the last few weeks, over on the far end of our property. There were 20 or so presents for him there, and he saw them and patted me on the neck. You're ... welcome? I think he was just happy they were all in one place so he could dispose of them. Or something. I don't get it.

All I know is that I'm never going potty in the fenced-in area by my doghouse. That's just gross.

Live it up,

Jax

Shutouts

Woof! Wassup.

Some of my predictions turned out OK: I had the White Sox winning that tiebreaker then getting in a hole against the Rays, and lo and behold, it happened.

It's Saturday morning, and all the series are at 2-0. The Rays and Red Sox look destined to meet, and the Dodgers and Phillies will play for the National League pennant. But Anything Can Happen In Baseball. Lest we forget.

Speaking of forget, every night around 9 I always smell something outside. I'll be watching SportsCenter with the family in front of the couch, maybe chewing on a bone, and I sense a deer outside. I've seen a doe and some baby deer, so I know they're out there. So I get up and wait by the front door and give a big "woof" so they know to let me out. Then I just bolt out there and raise hell, barking like crazy. I think that scares them off.

It's been a pretty lazy week for me. Just lounging around on the tiled bathroom floor. It's nice and cool in there.

Baggarly's break

For those of you who haven't read Andrew Baggarly, he's the Giants beat writer for the San Jose Mercury News. He keeps a blog called Extra Baggs, and this post is pretty cool. It's about his last day covering the Giants this season, thoughts on the Cy Young, Omar Vizquel, and what goes on in the Giants clubhouse. Enjoy.

My apartment

I thought you guys might want to see more photos of where I blog from. It's a carpeted garage with a fenced-in outdoor area. I keep my laptop in the doghouse. It's pretty sweet.

Sox appeal

I'm tired of watching the Red Sox win games, and I know I'm not alone. But I did like after the Red Sox beat the Angels last night 4-1 that Jason Bay (at right) actually said something self deprecating on national television. A lot of players don't do that.

Bay was asked what it was like to strike out twice to Angels pitcher John Lackey before launching one into the seats. Bay replied, "I strike out a lot, it's a big part of my game." Then he grinned and went back to the script about being lucky enough to hit a home run ... Maybe it's because he's from Canada.

For the Brewers fans tonight, let's hope C.C. Sabathia can come up with the goods and shut down the Phillies like Hamels did to them Wednesday night.

My cousin, Lex

This is some water rescue stuff that my cousin, Lex, is doing in Livermore. Lex and I came from the same farm in Washington state. While I'm blogging, Lex is doing useful things like learning to rescue people in the water and towing boats and stuff with his teeth. Sucker. This is like 9 minutes long so you can watch the first 30 seconds and you get the idea ... Looks refreshing.

Neuterrific news

Henry, no one's going to neuter you for being aggressive, don't worry. And congrats on the Brewers making the playoffs.

Nobody's going to bother me for a few hours in the garage, so let's break down the playoffs which begin Wednesday. All games on TBS, times are PST. These are 5-game series.

1. Brewers vs. Phillies, 12 p.m. Wednesday
Yes, C.C. Sabathia should win the MVP for his clutch pitching on not-enough rest and complete-game mastery. Unfortunately, they'll be facing the Phillies in the first game at Citizens Bank Park and that team is looking way past this series and into the World Series. I fear that the Brewers are way too happy just to get in the playoffs to make it any further, and their bullpen is marginal at best. The playoffs are all about relief pitching. Also Ryan Howard has been on fire at the plate in the second half of the season, so watch out Brew Crew.

2. Cubs vs. Dodgers, 3:30 p.m. Wednesday
This is going to be the series to watch. The Cubs have a lot to prove in the first game at Wrigley, and they are trying to break a 100-year curse and win the World Series. Billy goats, black cats and Steve Bartman be damned. I just wonder if the pressure will get to them--also, if you see those flags in center field blowing straight out to Lake Michigan, watch the hell out for Manny Ramirez and any other Dodgers poking line drives off the wall or on to Waveland and Sheffield avenues. Ramirez is a nutjob, but boy, can he hit. He has to be the most exciting hitter in baseball right now, and he's shown that he wants to make a statement in the playoffs. There is talk of changing the HOLLYWOOD sign to MANNYWOOD in L.A., but that's probably just a rumor. If there were an award for best trade of the year, I would nominate Dodgers GM Ned Colletti. Since I'm a dog who just learned to type and not a member of the Baseball Writers' Association of America, I'm probably not eligible to vote. Also, keep an eye on Cubs pitcher Carlos Zambrano. The guy is an animal.

3. Angels vs. Red Sox 7 p.m. Wednesday
I pretty much hate both these teams at this point, but I have to give it to the Angels. Top to bottom they are the best lineup in baseball. Since they clinched their postseason slot like three weeks ago, I wonder how fresh they will be. The Sox have hitters, Josh Beckett is coming off an oblique injury, so he's iffy. I like how he gets pissed and just manhandles hitters though, gotta say. He's got the fire in him.

4. Twins or White Sox vs. Rays, 12 p.m. Thursday
This is some weird stuff, with the White Sox forcing a tiebreaker on Tuesday night. By the time your read this, the White Sox may have sewn it up, or I'm wrong. I predict either team is going to get bent over by the Rays, so who cares.

Any questions? It's really hot in this garage (photo at right). Sometimes I wish I could just take off my fur for a day and be comfortable. Why did I have to be born a wookie?

Jax

Tim Lincecum for Prez

Even you non-Giants fans out there have probably heard of Tim Lincecum by now, after the Giants' final game of the season on Sunday and his last push for the Cy Young award.

Lincecum (18-5) should win it. I could rattle off stats (finished the season with a 2.62 ERA, MLB leading 265 strikeouts, etc.) but it should be stated that he just dominates hitters. Twelve strikeouts Sunday? Holy %*#!

In other Giants news, who knew our favorite overweight catcher Big Money Bengie Molina had a blog?

It describes the weirdness of his hit off the top of the right field wall Friday night in San Francisco against the Dodgers. The hit was eventually ruled a home run after a 12-minute "instant" replay call. I'm beginning to think this new replay rule, well, sucks.

At least it was ruled a homer, since it hit off the green roofing and LEFT A 3-INCH GREEN MARK ON THE BALL. Did we need TV cameras and slow motion to tell us that? High-Def? Umm, no.

Also, because Bengie Molina originally thought he just got a single and was replaced by pinch runner Manny Burriss at first base, Molina became the first player in major league history to hit a home run that counted--and then have someone else round the bases for him.

When Burriss got back to the dugout, Molina laughed and said to him, "Nice swing."

Around my house this weekend, my new friend and neighbor Snowflake (the yellow lab) took me to meet his next door neighbor, a black lab whose name I forget. They also have 2 horses. It was dusk, and I got a little lost on the hillside, and then the owner of the black lab grabbed me by the collar and called the phone numbers on my dog tag because she thought I was lost. I was just cruising around...

Then Stephen came to pick me up, wearing sandals on the mountain trail. They all talked and introduced each other. I just wanted everybody to know each other, that's why I wondered off. Yeah, that's it. Also, horse food tastes fucking delicious. And those never-ending troughs of water--MMMMmmm. I just want to jump in. And then shake.

(Yawn),

Jax

Yankees, shmankees

Yes, Yankee Stadium 1 is closed. Yes, Yankee Stadium 2 will have more seats behind home plate for $2,000. A lot of history was made in the stadium, a lot of money will be made in the new one. I think if they really cared about its history they would have renovated it again and not started from scratch.

I caught parts of the last Yankee game Sunday and the Red Sox/Blue Jays game. I think the Brew Crew might not be sunk yet. They are 10 games out of the NL Central but only 1.5 games back in the wildcard to the Mets. Win all six games left against the Pirates and the Cubs in the last series and you're in. And pray for the Phillies and Mets to stumble.

As for the Giants, they were mathematically eliminated last week. It's all about next season.

Also, at right is a photo of me and the garage that I'm blogging from. More photos to come. I just need to figure out how to post them with the posts.

I didn't sleep really well last night, I kept snoring and Brooke told Stephen to poke me. I wouldn't roll over on the hardwood floor. Why don't they just get earplugs or something?

Brew crew

Henry said..."Ned Yost got fired. Tonight good old Dale Sveum has his first night as the skipper and CC is on the mound against the Cubs. I WISH I HAD SATELITE SO I COULD WATCH IT!! Eh, they'll probably tank it anyway."

Thanks for the post, Henry. I feel you about the satellite, too. One day Stephen will sack up and get the Extra Innings package with all the games. Maybe if I ate a little less he could afford it ... Anyway, I think the Brewers still have shot at the wildcard, burt there's no way they can clinch the NL Central.

Looking at the rest of their schedule, the Brewers play the Reds on the road, then the Pirates and Cubs at home. The Cubs series is obviously going to be tough, but if they can win the other two series I think it's theirs to lose. The Mets are the other wildcard contender, and who knows what they can do.

If the Brew Crew makes the playoffs I still don't think CC Sabathia should be MVP or Cy Young material. You have to count his time with the Indians earlier in the season, where he went 6-8 and could be called close to piss poor.

Speaking of piss, I was all over the yard this morning. I don't know what's got in to me.

In baseball we trust,

Jax

Ain't no mystery

Read this:

"The Mystery of Barry Zito"
http://www.nytimes.com/2008/09/14/sports/playmagazine/0914play-ZITO.html?em

Staring at a baseball ... the guy's losing it.

Swimmingly

Going swimming in the reservoir yesterday afternoon was more fun than watching the Giants lose to the Diamondbacks when we got home. There was a rally in the bottom of the ninth, but it wasn't enough for a 6-7 loss. The Giants' runs probably hiked up Brandon Webb's ERA, so that's good for Tim Lincecum in the Cy Young race. Tim-may is pitching against Randy Johnson tonight in what should be a great game.

If Timmy can have two more strong starts, the Cy Young should be his.

On another note, the D-backs gained a game on the Dodgers last night (The D-backs are behind 3 1/2 games in the NL West) and I thought they looked built for the playoffs. Between Young in center field, Adam Dunn hitting, SS Drew (who went 4 for 5 last night) and Danny Haren and the Big Unit starting pitching -- this is what the Giants should be looking for next year. Something well rounded, balancing pitching with some sluggers. And we still need to steal bases.

I'm sold on Eugenio Velez and Pablo Sandoval for the Giants next season. And maybe Sandoval can play third base permanently, as he has been.

This garage that I'm typing from is nice and cool today. I wonder what treats Victor the painter has for me today! And will he ever finish painting our house?

Empty wrappers

I've been a bad doggy. Not just because I couldn't resist getting the in the trash this morning (How good are those greasy boxes from Jack in the Box? MMmmmm!). It's because I haven't blogged lately. I'm shooting for a post every weekday from the garage here.

I watched a few at-bats of the Giants-Diamondbacks game last night. The only play I really saw happened to be Adam Dunn's two run jack in the eighth that sealed Brad Hennessey's loss. Wasn't Hennsessy a closer? Why do we need him starting? Because Jonathan Sanchez is out? I'm confused.

In other confusion, we've got three good catchers and we're lacking everyday infielders for next season. Catcher Bengie "Big Money" Molina should have his contract renewed -- he has been a reliable hitter this season. Pablo Sandoval also looks solid as a starting catcher. Prospect Buster Posey could be brought up sometime next season, also a catcher. WTF?

Posey's coaches from college say he could play any position, and scouts and Baseball America writers have been singing his praises for years. Convert this guy to first base already and get him comfortable there in the minors. Hang on to Big Money because he can hit, what a shame he can't be a DH. Bengie is listed at 5'11, 225. Pablo is 5'11, 245 (!). Maybe they could be platooned at catcher next season to avoid injuries? I see guys like that and wonder how they can get around the bases... As long as you can put that weight behind the bat and crank 'em out, well, keep up the Jack in the Box, I guess. And make sure to leave the wrappers out so I can taste their sweet, sweetness. (I weigh 122 with dry fur, FYI. After swimming I'm like 150.)

In other news from Giants-end-of-season-almost-in-meaningless-games-limbo-land, it looks like SS Omar Vizquel is pretty much done as a Giant, shame. He doesn't fit in this youth movement even though he's an 11-time gold glover. It would be cool to see him as a third base coach with Tim Flannery at first. I read he's gunning to be a manager. And since they're both musicians, Vizquel and Flannery should play Zeppelin covers in the infield during seventh inning stretch and between any extra innings. Omar should sing in Spanish though. Con todo su corazon.

Adios,

Jax

This is so sweet

Oh man, life is good. I'm sitting here with my jaw on the ground panting, I've got the satellite TV finally hooked up, Giants are on against the Padres in the top of the fourth, and I've got the Internet blazing!

Stephen is sitting on the couch giving me looks. He thinks it's pretty weird that I'm typing on the ground here, but I don't care. Everything works! And Sandoval just hit a jack! All right! He reminds me of Prince Fielder, except he can hit right now.

Yeah. Keep it going ...

Jax

Buster down the door

Check this out:

"Giants' Posey: What can't he do?"
http://www.mercurynews.com/ci_10432773?IADI

Buster Posey is the next great hope for the Giants. I think they should keep Big Money Bengie Molina at catcher and shift Posey to first or second base in the next year or two.

Giants GM Brian Sabean has said that players need to spend less time in the minors now because there are so many other leagues -- winter ball, fall league, Hawaiian league, Cape Cod league, Venezuela league -- they're playing baseball all year, 24/7. Tim Lincecum was a product of all that too, and look how well he's done, so young.

Speaking of The Franchise, as of Wednesday, Lincecum led the NL in ERA (2.54), strikeouts (225) and is second in wins (16-3). The problem is that the people who vote on the Cy Young (East Coast sportswriters) know dick about the Giants besides that they are a losing team. The Snakes have nosedived lately, 2-8 in their last 10 games, so that could hurt Brandon Webb's chances. (P.S. I blew that whole D-Backs sail in to the playoffs prediction).

I just hope Lincecum can dominate in his final starts and make a real pitch for the Cy Young. Then let's pay him Zito type money for him to stay. OK, maybe not that much, but close.

On another note, I think I have fleas. Or ticks or something. I keep ssccratching the side of my neck with my hind leg and I just can't shake this one bugger. I hopped in bed last night as everyone was going to sleep around here to show them, but they didn't get it.

I have fleas, dammit! I slept on the floor. (Enjoy the photo of me at right.)

Get me some tick spray up in this,

Jax

Water water everywhere

The weather has turned foggy with light rain. I'm stuck in the garage here while the water company people dig holes and fit pipes around here. Once in a while they say 'hi.'

The Giants Tim Lincecum should win the Cy Young award, but he won't. I'll explain why in my next post. I'm gonna take a nap.

Jax

Ocho who?

Ocho Cinco ... oh brother. Thank you, dear commenter, for the link to the story about the Bengals' Chad Johnson legally changing his last name to Ocho Cinco so he could wear it on his jersey.

I don't usually deal in football, but this story speaks to the absurdity of that league and its flood of rules, criminal players (Ray Lewis, double murder), and larger-than-life egos. And yeah, there just might be a couple outsize egos in baseball too. But at least celebrating is frowned on in baseball.

I think Ocho Cinco was just trying to outdo Terrell Owens. When you look up "histrionic" in the dictionary, I think there ought to be a photo of good old Ocho with the new mohawk. (Histrionic. n. a personality disorder characterized by a pattern of excessive emotionality and attention-seeking. see at right: Ocho Cinco). Then maybe a photo fo T.O. for good measure.

What's going to be funny is during games when John Madden has to call him "Ocho Cinco" every time he touches the ball. Or maybe just "Cinco." This is a boon for ESPN Deportes.

In other Cincinatti Bengals jersey news, how do they fit receiver TJ Houshmand­zadeh's name on there? With a hyphen?

Feeling better,

Jax

I'm sensing something

Giants beat the Rox, I read in the Mercury News.

The DirecTV guy was really nice to me yesterday afternoon, because no one was here to let him in. He came in the garage, and I tried to bark directions at him to install it here, but he didn't seem to understand. He was Asian, (Nametag: Lee) and he just said "good doggy," like 100 times. I was ready to tackle him after he wired it just into the main house. "Put it in here!" I barked.

F- this. I've got this crappy radio and I'm tired of listening to Gary Radnich on KNBR. We need a second dish. Satellite dish, not a water dish. Imbeciles! And the Internet is fuzzy.

At least the fan works,

Jax

Baseball on the run

Oh brother. Lots of housework over Labor Day weekend. Very little baseball watching. Or college football. What the hay is going on? I heard the DirecTV guy is coming Wednesday. About freaking time.

Check out the new poll to the right. Old poll results: 2 people get sports news from "other dogs' baseball blogs," 1 lonely soul got their sports news from "newspapers." Great.

The highlight of my weekend was running out of the house when I heard the new grass trimmer engine starting. I ran right toward it and gave them a good scare. Ha! We also had my cousins Henry (thanks for posting) and Betty over and we played. I also ran on the beach and jumped in the water and in a fetid pond.

I have no idea how the Giants are doing, except they had the holiday off. Can we get like a backstop or a pitching mound in this new place? Just asking.

Still unsure where to crap,

Jax

Giants rookies worth keeping

Here's a preliminary list of yeas and nays for the 2009 Giants. Let me know if you agree, disagree. Also, subscribe to the blog at right and you'll get all the comments and posts sent to you.

Fred Lewis: Some clutch hits, above average fielder. But what's this about a bunion keeping him out of several games, and a mysterious "minor" quad injury that scratched him from tonight's game against the Reds (11-7 Reds won)?

Eugenio Velez: Yeah, I'd say keep him. Speed and hits.

John Bowker: Oooh, tough one. He started off so hot with back-to-back homers in his first two games. Damon Bruce on Sportsphone 680 was calling him "Babe Bowker," life was good. Then he hit the All Star break and starting taking suck pills or something. He was like 0 for 120 and sent back to Triple-A Fresno. He's got heart though.

Nate Schierholz: Dump this guy. His outfield skills are just awful. He had a particularly poor outing in June against the White Sox in left field, falling all over himself. So what he made a big play in the Olympics? Stateside that doesn't mean sh*t. I guess he's not on the 40-man roster, so whatever.

Pablo Sandoval: Oh hell yeah. This guy has made more of an impression than just about anybody in the second half of the season.

Ivan Ochoa: He can bunt. Undecided

Emmanuel Buriss: Who? Undecided

Your thoughts? Have no idea who any of these guys are? Write a comment or e-mail me: purplejaxbaxter@gmail.com. Check out some www.sfgiants.com.

Can't wait for dinner,

Jax

Lincecum, Cain, pray for rain

Sitting in this garage place is weird. It's hot in here, it's hot outside. Urgh. Sometimes I just wish I was a little Chihuahua, and I could just jump in my water dish to cool off. I don't know where to go potty. I guess that's the worst part. Maybe outside?

Stephen and I heard the middle innings of the Lincecum's start last night on KNBR-AM 680. Giants won 4-1 of course. It's like Lincecum, Cain, pray for rain. The other pitchers are bums.

He threw 132 pitches and Bochy pulled him. I say OK. I don't know who Lincecum's agent is, but he is not going to be playing for $400,000 next year. Maybe $4 million. This kid needs to be protected, physically and financially. He has the swagger and the story to be The Franchise, so let's lock him up already before the Scott Boras's of the world get to him first.

Very hot,

Jax

Lost in transition

I rested with my jaw on the floor last night and heard parts of the Giants-Rockies game on the radio. We need a TV, OK. This is bullshit.

My paw hurts. I'm on painkillers. But at least I have this new, carpeted "apartment" that Jim Dear and Darling (that's a Lady and the Tramp reference. The dog refers to his married owners by those names because that's what they call each other) keep calling it. It's actually a garage with a fenced in yard that I can hang out at during the day. Seems pretty sweet to me. I wonder what's in those paint cans ...

I have no idea what the Giants are up to because I have no Internet and this crummy radio.

Urgh.

Jax

Ooooh! It hurts!

Can't blog today. Cut my paw on some glass. Ooooohh! Thsssthhhh... Giants lost.

Cy Young, Tim Lincecum, Brandon Webb

Hey there, how ya doing? How ya doing?

Tim Linecum's name has been tossed around for the Cy Young award this year, which would be interesting considering the Giants are 58-72. "Tim-may," a k a "The Franchise" is 14-3 with a a 2.48 ERA and 200 strikeouts. But he's on a losing team. It's unlikely the Giants will get up to .500 this season, so is he pitching in less meaningful games than say, Brandon Webb? I would say, of course. Dummy.

Webb and the Snakes are bound to clinch the NL West. The rest of the Giants schedule? They play whipping post teams. Besides the Arizona series, and maybe the Dodgers, we're looking at the Reds, Pittsburgh (Pittsburgh?! c'mon), Rockies, the rudderless Padres again ...

All I know is I had to listen to the game yesterday on the radio cause we don't have a TV that works. What the hay? What the hay?

I know we're moving, but c'mon.

Ha-choo!

Jax

Win streaks

The Giants have won four in a row, matching their longest win streak of the season.

OK, that says something right there.

I've been told I need to get more angry in my blog posts, have more of a "take" in sports talk radio parlance. What they hey!

I don't have a lot to be angry about with the Giants. They're playing the rookies, the rookies are winning. I guess Eugenio Velez and Fred Lewis could get bunts down better. Ochoa continues to deliver some clutch hits.

I like (ex-Padre) Giants basecoach Tim Flannery's view on how to bunt a 98 mph fastball.

http://www.mercurynews.com/ci_10271176?IADID=Search-www.mercurynews.com-www.mercurynews.com

"These guys know the mechanics, so it becomes a matter of will,'' Flannery said. "You say, 'No matter what, I'm going to get this down.' You either turn the adrenaline and pressure into fear or you turn it into focus.''

Nice. That reminds me of when I'm chasing rabbits on the fire trail on walks. I'm going to get that bugger, it just takes some determination.

I missed Zito's start yesterday because I was moving. That was nuts! I found some peanuts and butter in the trash, ate them, felt weird, then I cut my paw on something on the ground. Our new house is awesome.

I can't wait until the TV is plugged in and we can watch Giants. I'm going to go wag my tail in front of Stephen now and nod over the TV so he can get the picture.

What the hey!

Jax

Olympics shmimpics

OK, I'm sick of diving, beach volleyball, women's softball, all that. I'm just tired of Bob Costas trying to make everything sooo dramatic and telling me that the telecast is "live" or "kinda live if you're on the East Coast" or "live-ish" from Beijing.

Whatever. Give me baseball.

Stephen and I watched the Giants game last night. Brian Wilson imploded, giving up a 3-run jack to the Marlins' John Baker in the top of the ninth to tie it. Wilson--who I heard was born again as a Christian in the off season--I think he mouthed something like "F- it, Jesus" after that homer went up. It's hard to tell with no audio.

Speaking of audio, this other dog in the neighborhood was barking throughout the game, so I couldn't hear Kruk and Kuip for much of anything. I had to bark back, naturally. My sense of smell is way better than my hearing, even with these big, floppy ears.

Anyway, Wilson aside, I'll admit I have a soft spot for "Big Money" Bengie Molina. We're both, let's face it, a little chubby. He's Latino, I'm black (fur). We both squat a lot (he's a catcher, comes from a family of catchers), you catch my drift.

In the bottom of the ninth Big Money hit a nice sac fly to center to bring in Dave Roberts and end it. Celebration on the mound! Now, if only we coud string together about 20 wins like that ...

Doggie out,

Jax

Maddux as a Dodger

My master and I saw it on the crawl on ESPN Monday night (you know, those news bits that scroll across the bottom) "Maddux traded to LA Dodgers for two minor leaguers and cash." Something like that. I guess this shouldn't be a surprise to Padres fans. It's August, they're 17 games out and, oh, run up the white flag.

For the Dodgers, what a spree lately. First they got "Man-Ram" (that still sounds weird to me, Jim Rome) from Boston, and now Maddux. Maddux replaces injured starter Brad Penny (shoulder) and LA only gave up two minor leaguers "yet to be determined" according to today's Mercury News. How could that yet to be determined? If this is some shrewd Padres trade, isn't that the key part of the equation? These guys should be studs, dammit, whoever they are.

The Dodgers are one game out and I would say, headed to the playoffs if they can gel in the next few weeks here.

The only other thing I have to say, because I'm ready to rest my jaw on the ground and take a nap here, is about the Billy Wagner situation in Mets land.

Teams that won't make the playoffs (read: Giants) ought to consider trading a reliever or closer to the Mets, who seem desperate. Could the Giants afford to get rid of a Brian Wilson? His stock is as high as its going to be (leads the NL with 33 saves) so why not try to get some promising minor leaguers or something. The Giants farm system seems to have shown squat lately, with the exception, obviously of Lincecum and a short list that follows.

The problem is Giants GM Brian Sabean doesn't have the cojones.

On a good note, San Jose's finest Kevin Frandsen was spotted dressed in the Giants dugout last night, nearly back from the ruptured Achilles. We're rooting for you, Kev.

See you at the dog park,

Jax

Welcome to my blog

Welcome to my blog. My name is Jax. I'm a dog who likes baseball.

I'm always talking about baseball and arguing with my master, Stephen. He doesn't know much about baseball players, managers, trades or really much of anything. So I try to educate him and his friends when they watch games on TV.

A lot of times I'll be resting with my jaw on the floor of the living room watching ESPN, and he'll be sitting next to me. While he's at work, I actually watch ESPNEWS all day while listening to KNBR-AM 680 The Sports Leader in the background. Since I got his Internet to work, I put on my glasses and read all the baseball blogs, I subscribe to Baseball America and all those other magazines. I read Andrew Baggerly's stories in the San Jose Mercury News, and Bruce Jenkins in the San Francisco Chronicle.

Each night we watch the Giants lose, again and again, naturally I have a lot to say about what's happening in the league and what could be done to save this team.

We get in to discussions and sometimes arguments. Recently, he turned to me and said, "If you know so much, why don't you start a blog?"

And I said, "The hell with you, maybe I will."

So, here it is: unfiltered baseball knowledge, straight from a dog with satellite TV, a fast Internet connection, and Peter Gammons on speed dial. (OK, I'm lying about the Peter Gammons part. But stick with me here. I'm typing this at paw speed, OK?)